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April 21, 2012 / ccollinsonjones1

Office swingball

You're not supposed to use the ceiling

Some offices have ping pong tables, others table football. Being the sort of establishment that shuns such safe and gentle pastimes, we have a swingball set. Right in the middle of the office.

One inch over to the left and it’d smash a computer (probably vastly improving its performance – it’s a Dell), but this single piece of office equipment, if you can get past all the peril and mayhem, is more valuable than the printer. Or the server.

You see, when you emerge from a long meeting, square eyed from PowerPoint, stuffed full of disappointing biscuits and lukewarm coffee, this is the quickest, most enjoyable and most effective way to get your focus back. A few hearty whacks, a couple of surprised screams, and you’re feeling tip top again.

I’m not a natural with a ball but I’m learning. After some merciless workplace bullying my colleagues stopped laughing at all the flailing and offered me instruction. Mostly they just repeated the phrase ‘look at the ball’ until I finally absorbed it. After much frustration, hitting the ceiling, getting my bat tangled in the rope, ducking out of the way, and missing so hard I nearly spun myself right around, I can now play a passable game.

Yes it’s disruptive and dangerous, but it’s an instant head-clearer and it’s way more appropriate in the work place than, say, having a big shouty outburst or sobbing hopelessly into your keyboard.

You should probably just email this link to your boss. Happy, relaxed workforce for under £30.

You’re welcome.

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